Growlygracepress's Blog


My name is Deirdre and I am made of Marmite.
December 13, 2016, 9:47 am
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I am the living personification of Marmite you either love or hate me but the people who come back again to this blog know that and are all rightish about it. My stock in trade is waving my bloody stumps and scab picking. Still making a choice. Owning every particle of my own ‘unsuccessfulness’ embracing the suck which is ‘failure’

I don’t have that network  intense friendships. I will meet for a cup of coffee with people who I value a handful of times though out the year. I ‘touch base’ with a lot of people maybe about twenty or so, these are people who I meet while walking about. Some of these people I’ve been talking to for thirty or so years and I don’t know their names but I know about illness, love, career, disappointment and success. I might not see them for years but I’ll bump in to them in Tesco’s and they will update me immediately. I am always supportive and excepting in these little exchanges.

Where am I going with this? For the first time that I am aware of I have righteously pissed of several of these people in the far away periphery of my life. It’s about the political landscape and the assumptions we make about each other, we take some things for granted and I create safe little bubbles for people who talk at me in a couple of these ‘things’ in the ‘exchange’ I have expressed my version of ‘truth’ and it has not gone down well and these women are furious and are acting out like bad teenage girls in a playground. A woman the other day literally turned her back on me when I said Hello. I was left standing thinking ‘did she just do that’ and when I seen her again yesterday I made out again with the big full on cheery “hello!!!!” and she grunted and looked at the ground and kept on walking and I win and I keep on winning because every single time I see this woman from now on I am going to be full on.

Sometimes when we are being honest and truthful with each other it gets dirty and rude and bullying and I point it out when I see it and move on and do my shopping in Morrisons.

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🙂 xx

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